I'm about to admit what very few people admit... not every second of my pregnancy was fun. OK I said it, it's out there for the world to see. But let me explain:
I LOVE everything about creating a new life and I think it's one of the coolest things women get to experience in their life. But with an already self-concious mind and a worry-wart brain I couldn't help but feel a bit in the dark at first. I knew nothing about how to feel comfortable in my ever growing skin and was doing all I could to eat healthy, work out as much as possible (when I wasn't sleeping my days away... not depression, human being creating!), and stay stress and frustration free. Not to mention the sex life... which is super important (as funny as that may be) because you need to feel that love and connection you once felt with your love. My body grew and it didn't feel like I looked like a cute pregnant lady, it felt like a fatty lump-kin. It was also hard because I've always been one of those girls that look to other people to say "ok I'd like to look like that, lets get to working out!" and I did the same at the start of this pregnancy. I went on babycenter and looked at other women's pictures of their belly, which needless to say made me feel worse because some people get really round cute bellies fast, and some stay stick thin... neither of which happened to me!
That being said, I searched for help on what to wear that made me feel comfortable and still cute, thus prompting my feeling good!
It's funny to see pictures of me at the start because I feel like I look a little dead. I wasn't 100% happy at my work place and had no friends that were going through the same things, only words of encouragement were getting me through. Goes to show what stress does to the body (mainly my face... so pale) and now I know... stress before money/financial security! I learned the hard way that only I can take control of how I'm feeling, and that only I will look out for my physical, mental, and emotional health and well being.
Here's 17 weeks in December... right before we found out that we're having a baby boy!! Amazing work has been done already!
So I quit my job after Christmas and started the journey of house-wife-ing it up!! I've started to cook, take the bossy boy on nice long walks, and have kept up the cleaning and laundry. It might sound silly but these are things I've wanted to do my whole life. I've always said that I'd like to stay at home with my kids for as long as possible because I want to raise them and be with them... not watching them grow like weeds before my eyes and wake up one day with a 16 year old that wants to move out! HA
I can say with a huge smile on my face that I have never been happier being at home and working on my self and keeping myself happy before all others, of course Wayne and bossy both have their needs too. Here starts the FUN part of my journey!
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